Comments for Grapevine - The Blog

Comment on Why Working Memory Is So Important by Linda Bryant

Linda Bryant — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 14:17:48 +0000

I’m delighted to hear that working memory is important. People have often been scornful of memory, suggesting it isn’t as important as ‘deep learning’ – but surely that is what memory is about too?
I’ve always had an excellent memory, sometimes virtually total recall. I remember sitting in an exam and visualising the page in a book that the topic was on and reading through to be able to answer the question. I was 16 or 18 – the problem came when I hadn’t read about the subject!
Now I’m in my 50s and my memory isn’t so good – perhaps I have too much in the memory to be able to recall so clearly? I understand that stress can diminish memory. I’ll have to re-learn some of the techn iques I’ve instinctively used to help improve my memory in the past.
Thanks for an interesting article

Comment on Why Working Memory Is So Important by Dominic Hyland

Dominic Hyland — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 10:29:57 +0000

These ‘tricks’ totally work though. A couple of months ago I bought a Derren Brown audio book, my colleague and I listened to it during our 1 hour drive to work. By the end of the trip we could list in order, forwards and backwards, a list of 20 things Derren read out. I was so impressed that I taught my 9 year old the technique and, after a little practice, he could recite a list of 50 random things I spoke out, both forward and backward. The pride he felt was indescribable and my wife was totally amazed.

Comment on Have You Ever Bullied Anyone? by Yolande

Yolande — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 22:19:52 +0000

Dear,
Thank you for this information. Yes, unconsciously I have used the technique last week at work – via email to him and co-workers in copy; and the Manager calmed down. Great to read the confirmation.

But unfortunately all the bullying is not over; he continues and is attacking others in his department. To our knowlegde HR is doing nothing/no actions taken. He seems to have a “license to kill”.

The reason why I am still working there is because I never was bullied in such a degree; and at the same time it fascinates me although it is not pleasant to be bullied; and learn at present alot on the subject “hands-on”

Comment on Have You Ever Bullied Anyone? by Dianne M. Hayden

Dianne M. Hayden — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 14:16:44 +0000

These suggestions are useful to promote active listening and problem solving amongst students and adults.

Comment on Have You Ever Bullied Anyone? by Donovan

Donovan — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 11:45:22 +0000

Hi Nancy

This is a great topic and it has so many paths and never a right answer. It’s all a matter of what side of the fence you sitting on.

A prime example is two male employees in the same office, they are having a meeting one raises his voice to make his point, the other raises his voice even higher to counter act this point. In the scheme of things it looks like a healthy debate. To the observer this is nothing to write about. Let’s change it, the one shouting the loudest is a white male, in most cases it’s deemed as OK, a manager showing effectiveness. If this scenario is now flipped on it head then the behaviour of the black employee will be deemed as aggressive (A form of bullying). Let’s flip this again and the person in question is a woman (black or white no difference) then this behaviour is deem as historical.

So my point is what? Is this all a judgement call or in the case of the rugby player if he reacts then is he a bully or simply just misunderstood.

Behaviour is something we need to understand as we cannot blanket all behaviour with one statement. Yes we do have to draw the line somewhere but who’s drawing the line and why did the draw the line there…

The never ending question

Comment on Have You Ever Bullied Anyone? by Christine

Christine — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 10:46:57 +0000

Hi Nancy

Thank you so much for the emails you send on various topics I always find them very useful especially the Tantrum Technique one.

Regards

Christine

Comment on A Good Question by Caroline Hogarth

Caroline Hogarth — Wed, 24 Feb 2010 10:14:00 +0000

Oh yes indeed, PedroStephano, a very powerful tip to remember.
It can be highly entertaining for observers to watch a skilled questioner ask a question of another skilled questioner. The ensuing silence becomes a test of resolution and Zen-like serenity as each becomes more determined not to break the silence first.

In normal circumstances though, simply asking the question and waiting patiently will lead to a far more meaningful answer than asking, then filling the silence with a follow-up or even (horrors) suggesting an answer and undoing all your good work.

Comment on A Good Question by PedroStephano

PedroStephano — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 19:14:40 +0000

…..and remember, when you’ve posed a good question, the silent time whilst awaiting an answer should be left unfilled. Any interruptions at this point will change the (perhaps clunky, perhaps revolutionary) thought processes that are going on. Don’t break the silence, and you’ll get the good answer that your good question generated…….

Comment on How to Cope with Stressful Situations and Shocks by Nancy

Nancy — Sun, 21 Feb 2010 14:45:11 +0000

Sorry for the delay in answering this.

From the research by Matt Leiberman and others just saying how you feel or writing it down reduces the strength of the emotions. It is quite the opposite of what most people would predict but it does work.

Comment on How to Cope with Stressful Situations and Shocks by Caroline

Caroline — Wed, 10 Feb 2010 11:03:39 +0000

Restored Comment From Phil Commons

Just a point to clarify . Talking or writing down your emotions seems to be the opposite of supressing them as say with friends.
Which should you do when- do we bottle them and focus on other things or share them ?